As I swooned day and night about the heart aching dreams of walking painless blocks in Christian Louboutins to my face-to-sunglass meetings with Anna Wintour, I had no shame in the fact that my most fashionable items ranged from an American Eagle candy green and cream striped sweater and the cropped and frilled floral printed tank top that my best friend had bought for me in California and my mother had scolded me for wearing in response to the "cleavage" I was apparently advertising. This idea of becoming something of talks in an industry so vast and becoming was just that at the time. An idea.
Today I can't go an hour without checking zara online for sales, reading street style blurbs or gawking over Alexa Chungs chic-sighted, flip-phone-captured, hashtagged and Instagram-fan-posted update. But then, I would have stopped in my tracks in complete shock at the progress I've made alone in simply understanding the lingo. Let alone the silent pat I give myself on the back when I can play name-that-designer before the stars tell-all about who is at the mercy of such fabric.
Sometimes I wonder how much I will surprise my 12-year-old self when the mail-man hand delivers me my invitation to NYFW or I watch teen girls read a book that I maybe-might-someday write. Maybe getting a phone call from mui mui asking to feature their new shoes on my blog, or Leandra Medine emailing me to grab lunch. (In which case you can go ahead and dig my grave because I will have completed enough check marks on my bucket-list). Or let's say maybe nothing ever happens to me besides I move out to California start my life raise my kids to know who Oscar De La Renta was and that mommy writes a blog that gets a lot of views, yet heavily shy of fame and fortune.
It's good to know Gods the only one whose gotta work that out. It's better to know that he's already got it worked out and one day he'll let me in on all the fun. But I do hope that one day, when it's all said and done I can look in the mirror and still appreciate the candid chaos of throwing together something seemingly symphonic in a matter of minutes before walking out the door.
photos by: pinterest